The Hawtline

HELLO, INTERNET. After a long hiatus due to technical probz in addition to IRL obligations (shocking, I know!), TWIGBy and I are BACK with a brand new (sorta) episode: EPISODE 9!!!

Truth be told, we recorded this episode nearly a month ago and I was only able to edit it just yesterday. I was planning to scrap it but TWIGz insisted we keep it, cos it came out kinda great, surprisingly.

In any case, thanks for sticking with us, guys! We’ve got lots more ridiculousness coming soon.

Once again, I’m gonna take this space to AGAIN invite the intimidatingly amazing Ben Brown onto the show for the next episode: EPISODE NUMBER FREAKIN’ 10. CAN YOU BELIEVE?! I know we asked him and he accepted last time, but that was months ago, so.. yeah. MR. BROWN. PLEASE WILL YOU BE ON OUR SHOW? I certainly hope so since we kinda announced it 23 times during this episode. There’ll be a whole world wide web with blue balls if this doesn’t pan out, you know.

Thanks to everyone who submitted their questions and calls for this episode! They were all pretty hilarious, ngl. Don’t forget, you can submit questions to TWIGBy and myself anytime by heading over to http://thehawtline.tumblr.com/submit, or by calling our voicemail at 305.982.7476!

Music featured in this episode:

• Christina Aguilera — Genie in a Bottle
• Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros — Home
• Raekwon ft. Inspectah Deck, Method Man, Ghostface Killah — House of Flying Daggers

OH, ALMOST FORGOT. Don’t forget to subscribe to us on iTunes, right here:

AWESOME!

Helloooooo, Outtakes!

Hi, innernet!

Here’s the newest episode of The Hawtline that TWIGBy and I recorded on Tuesday night. This was a fun episode cos we got CALLS for the first time and I was really excited about it, like a total loser.

Topics discussed in this weeks show include:

• Mr Skin’s top 10 nude scenes ever
• WOLF SHIPS
• How breaking up is hard to do
• Cheech
• Canadian h8 
• and MORE!

We also discussed at length how terrified I am of Ben Brown, you know, considering he holds a good chunk of my innernet life in his terrifying, pointing hands.

BUT, this episode also served as a FORMAL INVITATION to The Man In Charge to be on the show, as we’d be delighted to have him. But if he openly compares me to Stereotest, I will cry. I am already planning the number of drinks I will consume during that show.

So BEN BROWN, INTERNET ROCKSTAR, will you be on our humble little podcast?

Anyway, back to today’s show, we’re lookin’ for an intern. SKANKO? YOU’D BE THE PERFECT INTERN. WE TALK ABOUT YOU INCESSANTLY ANYWAY. YOU ARE PART OF THE HAWTLINE FAMIRY.

‘Til next time, submit your questions, call our voicemail (305.982.7476!!!), leave us comments, and get your hot friends to follow us. Hell, get even your ugly friends to follow us.

Music featured in this episode:

• Enrique Iglesias — Bailamos
• Friendly Fires — Kiss of Life
• Camera Obscura — French Navy

Sup, sexies?! TWIGBy and I recorded our most recent episode last night and I have it here for you already this morning. AWESOMEEEEE. We finally got around to doling out our sage advice, and I wanna give a big thank you to those of you who submitted questions for us this week!

Some people submitted questions after we’d already finished the recording, but don’t worry, we’ll get to you next episode.

BIGHUGENEWS!!!! The Hawtline finally has… A HOTLINE?! Oh, heck yes. Now you have THREE ways to leave us questions, comments, confessions, insults, and your mom jokes:

• By using the submit form at http://thehawtline.tumblr.com/submit
• By emailing us at thehawtline@tumblr.com
• By CALLING us at 305.982.7476 or 305.982.PHRO. haaahaahahah. AMAZING!

Music featured in today’s show:

• The Notorious B.I.G. — Hypnotize
• Me & Mrs. Jonas — SOS [link]
• TV on the Radio — Wolf Like Me

Arrite have a great humpday guyzzzz.

SUNDAY THROWBACK!

So, every Sunday, we’ll be posting up an old episode of The Hawtline, going backwards starting from the most recent, until we’re all caught up here on Tumblr. We’re gonna start the Sunday Throwback with the episode we did last May, Episode #5 featuring our good friend Bizzy!

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Bizzy is amazing.
• TWIGBy finally names his dong.
• Bizzy speaks in a Kirsty-inspired accent and it is seriously the best thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life.
• We talk a lot of crap.
• Goats? And other farm animals? Seriously?
• Other stuff.

Music featured in this episode:

• Human League — Don’t You Want Me
• Franz Ferdinand — Michael
• Sophie B. Hawkins — DAMN! I Wish I Was Your Lover (AHAAHAHA)
• A DOOMSTICK-inspired mini-track by the wonderful Jay Def

THIS WEEK, TWIGBy and I are finally gonna record a new episode and we’ll see how that goes since we’ll be trying some new stuff. Yep.

ENJOY.

Here’s the latest episode (NUMBER SIX!!!) of The Hawtline with our guest this week, Nikki. This show was SUPER LONG but I managed to cut it down to just over an hour, so I think I deserve some props haaaaahaha. Other than that, it was a lot of fun, even though I was totally outnumbered by THE CANADIANS.

In this episode we discuss:

• Fax machines
• WEDDINGS?!!?!!?OMG.
• THE AUSTRALIA
• Dads
• Babies with afros
• Schlomo Ziegler
• Ointment
• How much of a stud TWIGBy is

Music featured this episode:

• Rex Manning — Say No More, Mon Amour [link]
• Das Racist — Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell [link]
• Passion Pit — Moth’s Wings

ENJOY. Leave comments. Follow us. Like us. Enlargen our E-PENIS.